If your body could talk, what would it say?

A few months ago, I read an article that posed this question. I wrote the following answers:

JAW: I’m tight and I grind your teeth at night! Why do you make me sit in an office all day? Why don’t you take the time to go to yoga class, actively relax, and let me calm down? Why do you load pressure after pressure above me in your brain without realizing that you need some daily RELEASE or your body is going to backfire? I know I’m just a symptom, but you should listen to me more than you do. And protect me with a retainer.

RIGHT ANKLE: Why can’t you get your eating and weight under control, so you put less pressure on me and don’t have to make me run and walk and exercise with all this weight on top of me? If you could exercise some self-control then I wouldn’t be in this mess. And let me use the heel lifts more often; I need them!**  And stop being so conceited about your appearance that you won’t wear your running shoes while you’re walking around. You KNOW how much better I feel when you’re wearing them.

**Shoe inserts that I’m supposed to wear to avoid getting heel bursitis again: a story for another day.

NECK/SHOULDERS: Stop ignoring us!!!!! You hunch over all day and we don’t feel good. Stretch us out, more often than once a week at yoga class.
STOMACH: You are getting better at listening to me. Thank you. I don’t like big loads of food; just small portions, more frequently. Why are you scared to eat frequently? I don’t like 3-big-meals; it makes me feel sluggish. Thank you for joining ww** and making a concerted effort to have a better relationship with me. I’m sorry I make you hungry when you’re not. I know that if you and I had a better relationship then you could improve your relationship with jaw, right ankle, and neck/shoulders.  Also, eat more fruit; I like fruit, especially in the morning on an empty stomach. I like it when you make the effort to keep it in the house!
**I’ll discuss this in another post, too.

I sent these answers to my dear friend, Status Quoman, who responded with an e-mail expressing concern about my body image. I think her exact words were “your ankle is a serious asshole.” I agree, but things have changed a lot in the last few months. Let’s see what my body would say today:

JAW: If you did more yoga I would hurt less. I really think you need to get out your stress via physical activity and deep breathing, or it all goes to me! I know you know this, and I know you’re trying to be better. Thanks for that.

RIGHT ANKLE: Thanks for taking it easy on the running. I know you like it, but it’s hard on me. I feel MUCH better now than I did a year ago. Thanks for that. And thank you for wearing your running shoes more often. I feel so cozy and supported in them!

NECK/SHOULDERS: Ditto on the yoga. When you stretch out your lower back, I don’t hurt as much. I know you don’t like sitting at a desk any better than I do, and I know you’re trying to change that. 

STOMACH: Thanks for making an effort to strengthen me. I like feeling strong. My confidence goes down when you don’t use me and I get flabby. Oh, and thanks for not overstuffing me over the holidays. Remember after Christmas dinner when I felt all warm and fuzzy? You should eat wholesome food like that all the time! Not too much sugar; it makes me feel nasty. I know your mouth craves sweets, but before you eat them, remember the feeling you get when they hit me!

Your turn! If your body could talk, what would it say? Does it “speak” differently than it did in the past?